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NEWS

Understanding Intra-Community Toxicity in the LGBTQ+ Community

Episodes of hostility, exclusion, and infighting that raise questions about why members of an already marginalized group would turn on one another.

December 9, 2024

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By David Radinoff

The LGBTQ+ community has long been celebrated for its resilience, solidarity, and commitment to equality in the face of discrimination and oppression. From the fight for marriage equality to transgender rights, the LGBTQ+ movement has often demonstrated the power of collective action and support. However, beneath this surface of unity, there are instances of toxicity within the community itself—episodes of hostility, exclusion, and infighting that raise questions about why members of an already marginalized group would turn on one another.


This intra-community tension is a complex phenomenon, shaped by both external and internal forces. One of the primary reasons for this discord lies in the social hierarchies that exist within the LGBTQ+ community. Like in the broader world, issues of privilege, power, and identity play out in harmful ways. Despite shared experiences of marginalization, some individuals within the LGBTQ+ community benefit from intersecting privileges, such as race, socioeconomic status, or gender identity, while others face compounded marginalization. For example, white, cisgender gay men may experience less stigma and gain more social acceptance than transgender people or LGBTQ+ people of color. This uneven distribution of power can foster resentment, with those at the intersections of multiple oppressions feeling excluded or invalidated within the broader LGBTQ+ movement.

Image: Adobe Stock

Additionally, the effects of minority stress—a term describing the chronic stress faced by marginalized communities—can manifest in harmful interpersonal dynamics. LGBTQ+ individuals often internalize the discrimination they face in society, which can lead to feelings of shame, self-doubt, or insecurity. These emotions, when unaddressed, can sometimes turn outward, manifesting as hostility or judgment toward others in the community. It is not uncommon to witness forms of gatekeeping or exclusionary behavior, where individuals police each other’s identities or experiences in an effort to establish their own sense of belonging. For instance, bisexual individuals may be told they are “not queer enough” or accused of benefiting from straight-passing privilege, while transgender and nonbinary individuals can face misunderstanding or erasure even within LGBTQ+ spaces.


Internalized homophobia and transphobia also play a significant role in fostering toxicity. For many LGBTQ+ individuals, growing up in a heteronormative and cisnormative society meant internalizing negative beliefs about their own identities. Even after coming out, some individuals struggle with lingering feelings of discomfort or disdain toward themselves or others who visibly express their LGBTQ+ identity. This can lead to behaviors like shaming those who are more flamboyant or dismissing the experiences of transgender or gender-nonconforming individuals. The pressure to conform to societal norms or to distance oneself from more stigmatized aspects of the LGBTQ+ community can create deep divisions within the group.

Another key factor is the pressure of perfection that often comes with representing a marginalized community. LGBTQ+ individuals are frequently held to higher standards, both by themselves and by others, to prove that they are worthy of acceptance. This can lead to a sense of competition or comparison, with individuals feeling the need to criticize others who they believe reflect poorly on the community. This might take the form of shaming someone’s appearance, gender expression, or lifestyle choices. In this dynamic, people may police others' behaviors, fearing that deviating from a perceived norm could harm the collective struggle for rights and equality.


Additionally, the digital age has exacerbated these tensions. Social media, while a vital tool for LGBTQ+ visibility and connection, has also become a breeding ground for toxic behavior. Online platforms often amplify judgment and exclusion, with people feeling emboldened to criticize others from behind the safety of a screen. This can result in harsh, unfiltered comments about someone's identity, choices, or appearance, deepening divisions within the community.

Image: Adobe Stock

However, it’s essential to recognize that despite these tensions, the majority of LGBTQ+ individuals remain deeply committed to fostering solidarity and inclusivity. Efforts are continually being made to address these issues, whether through community-building initiatives, mental health support, or intentional conversations about privilege and intersectionality. It is crucial to acknowledge the pain caused by both external discrimination and internal strife while also working to create spaces that are affirming and compassionate for all LGBTQ+ individuals.


In conclusion, the toxicity within the LGBTQ+ community is not inevitable, but it is a reflection of the broader societal forces that shape the lives of marginalized people. By addressing issues of privilege, internalized oppression, and the pressure of perfection, the LGBTQ+ community can work toward healing these divisions and building a more inclusive movement. Ultimately, unity will not come from erasing differences but from embracing and respecting the diverse experiences and identities within the LGBTQ+ spectrum.

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About the author

David has a passion for writing that centers queer issues, culture, and the nuances of personal identity. With a background in both journalism and creative writing, his work spans a wide range of topics, including the complexities of identity, the intricacies of relationships. He has contributed to numerous online publications and print outlets, providing thought-provoking essays that explore the intersections of pop culture, social justice, and LGBTQ+ advocacy.

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